It was her fault I had the bald spot!
I mean, I was the one who did the twisting, but it really was her idea.
The story went like this.
I was probably in third or fourth grade.
Definitely no older than that.
And I was reading Beverly Cleary's Ellen Tebbits.
How I loved that girl!
I loved her stick straight, unruly, brown hair.
My hair wasn't stick straight, but it was definitely brown and unruly,
just like Ellen's.
I loved that she had lots of great ideas,
like pulling up a giant beet,
from a muddy lot vacant lot
before school one day.
Those good ideas with glitches regularly happened in my life too.
And I loved that Ellen and her best friend, Austine Allen,
regularly had friend difficulties,
that left them not-talking for several days.
that sometimes happened to me
with my best friend, Susie Allen
But we were actually talking about twisting the hair.
Ellen was always twisting her hair,
And then I started twisting my hair,
and got a bald spot the size of a quarter on the back of my head
and my mom was sure that I had a fatal disease
and took me to visit Dr. Pollard
And then he asked if I had any idea
what could have happened to my hair,
and then he noticed that I was twisting my hair
while we were talking
and asked why I was doing that
and I told him about Ellen Tebbits,
and he laughed and laughed,
and my mom was mortified.
And told me I was't allowed to twist my hair any more.
but I still did it sometimes.
I actually even do it now,
when I'm tired.
So you see, it really was Ellen Tebbits' fault
that I had that bald spot.
But she was still one of my very best childhood friends.
Rest in peace, Beverly Cleary