Somehow I have enrolled in Parenting 108. You know, the one that people have to take, when they just keep failing. And I just keep taking it over and over and over again. My sons are not children, in fact, they are 26 and 28. We have been doing the failure to launch thing for years, or maybe forever.
My oldest son has been diagnosed with schizophrenia. He's does ok as long as he takes medication. Once or twice a year he decides he doesn't need medication and things get ugly. But right now, he is doing ok. He lost his license, so he rides an electric bike to work every morning. Sometimes, if it's snowy, I give him a ride, but mostly, he rides his bike. This morning, it was 28 degrees, and the wind was blowing. Hard.
My younger son hadn't worked for more than about two weeks in over three years, since before COVID. Recently, he got a job he really likes. At a bullet company. And did I mention he owns several guns? Or that I am a pacifist who hates, hates, hates anything to do with guns? He won't tell me anything, and I mean anything, about the job because he knows I am really uncomfortable with the whole deal. It's his life, and he can make his own choices. I just need to keep my mouth shut.
A few weeks ago, I decided I wasn't buying groceries for my guys anymore, because when I buy groceries, they use their money for other things. Like marijuana and liquor. And I thought maybe if they had to pay for their own food, they'd have less to spend on other things. I also took them off of my phone plan. So far, they just seem to be eating a lot of takeout.
Nobody told me that parenting adult children would be so hard. I wonder if I will ever get to the 200 level courses.
Oh, Carol, It doesn't sound like simple challenges you have with your guys, but it does sound like you are working to help them become responsible adults. All the best to you and your guys!
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