Tuesday, July 3, 2018


I am a morning person. I love, love, love the early hours of the day. I bounce cheerily out of bed at a time my sons grumpily  refer to as the "butt crack of dawn," take my shower, have my breakfast, throw my teacher bag out of my shoulder, and I'm off. I'm pretty much always one of the first people in the parking lot at work.

Son #1, on the other hand, is NOT a morning person. When I adopted the boys, Son #1 was 9, and one of my biggest learnings that first year was that not everyone wakes up bright and cheery.  Not everyone wants to interact right away. Or eat breakfast. Son #1 and I have had many, ummm, less-than-stellar interactions in the morning.

Since the boys have been driving, it's been a little easier. You see, I'm usually gone long before they awaken. I sometimes text, or leave them a note, but I don't see my sons in the morning. And I think
that's better for all of us.

Except not in the summer. In the summer, I am around a little more. I see what's going on. And it pretty much makes me crazy.

Take this morning for instance.

I was awake right around 5. I had my shower, did a little spiritual reading and reflection, and then went to work around 6, in preparation for a meeting at 9:30. At about 7:20, it occurred to me that Son #1 was still not up. Son #1 has to be at work at 8. He works close to downtown. Downtown is about twenty minutes from our house, when traffic is good. At this time of day, traffic is never good. And he has to park in a lot and catch a van to his actual work site at 7:50

I wonder if I should wake him up, but remind myself he is an adult. He can set an alarm. He can get himself up.

At 7:24, I hear him emerge from his bedroom and head to the bathroom. Phew. But he is in there ten minutes. I know there is no way he will be on time. My stomach is in knots, but I don't say anything.

And then he comes out and is in his bedroom for another few minutes, presumably getting dressed.  I resist the urge to tell him that he is going to be late. He is an adult after all. He is supposed to be able to manage his own time.

At 7:41 he emerges from the bedroom, and saunters toward the door. Every fiber of my being feels the need to scream,"HURRY UP!!!! YOU'LL BE LATE. PEOPLE GET FIRED FOR BEING LATE!" I bite my tongue, look up from my computer, and smile.

"Goodbye, have a good day."

He smiles back and manages, what for him, a non-morning person, is a somewhat pleasant greeting. "Uh-huh." And then he walks out the door. At 7:42. He is definitely going to be late. But I didn't say anything. Crisis averted. 

I am so glad I am a morning person. I am really thankful I go to work before he gets up. I couldn't stand this every morning.


Molly Hogan said...

You captured this moment so well. I am a morning person and can totally relate to having to learn that others are not. I am uber-impressed with your restraint when your son was running late and loved reading your shared thoughts, which sadly. I would probably have voiced. Kudos to you!

Ramona said...

Oh, Carol, I so admire your ability to bite your tongue. When my son-in-law was living with us, he used to take his cereal bowl to the bedroom so he wouldn't have to talk to me. Once I'm up, I'm ready to talk. Just don't try to have a meaningful conversation with me after 9 pm.

Mandy said...

Thank you for sharing this slice. I am struggling with watching a couple of teenage daughters here with mornings and it's very hard to bite your tongue. Your piece made me think I'm not alone nor crazy!

Mary Lee said...

I am a morning person who lives with a night owl. Somehow he managed to survive two weeks of living with the typical world's schedule while we were in Europe. Getting up at a "normal" time may have even rubbed off a bit on him -- or maybe he has realized that if he wants to enjoy my company in the summer, he better be awake when I am!!