I am sitting with three eighth graders. We have just finished a session of our state's blessed event and are waiting to be released for an all middle school afternoon recess. I had rushed from lunch recess duty to begin our time together, and hadn't had time to change out of my tennis shoes. One of the boys keeps looking at my feet. I think he is bothered by my tennis shoes, but that turns out not to be the case. Finally he comes right out and asks:
P: Are those tights miss?
Me: No, they're nylons.
P: Nylons? But are they tights?
Me: No they are called nylons. They aren't as heavy as tights.
P rubs my legs. Having taught primary grades for years, I'm used to this, but kind of surprised that an eighth grader would find my legs interesting.
P persists: But they are kind of like tights?
Me: Well kind of. Ladies wear them with their dresses. Doesn't your mom wear them sometimes?
P looks a little perplexed. I think most women occasionally wear pantyhose, so I continue.
Me: Sometimes they're called pantyhose. Does your mom wear pantyhose?
P shocked, I think that I would ask about his mom's undergarments: Yes (almost indignantly), my mom wears underpants (emphasis on the word underpants, not to be confused with panties but perhaps closely related).
I realize that he think I am implying that his mother does not wear underwear
and try to back my way graciously out of the situation.
Me: Sometimes ladies call them hose.
Not sure why but this causes all three kids to roll on the floor in hysterical laughter.
Thankfully, the bell rang and we were allowed to go outside. I can just see the headlines. Denver teacher asks eighth grader about mom's underwear.
And that is kind of how the whole week has gone.